Prof. F.J Lewis
History Today
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DB: Good evening and welcome to History Today.
We continue this evening with the subject of the Enclosures Act and its effect on the English rural population. As it would appear, there are those who fear that last week myself and Professor Lewis didn't quite make the inroads into the subject that perhaps we might.

So I wonder, Professor Lewis, whether you would agree with the Marxists that the Enclosures Act forms the point at which government first effectively becomes state.
   
RN:

{Slide of what looks like a 17th century lord in full wig and coat}
See that?

   
DB: I have observed the image.
   
RN: That's you in your latest clothes, that is. That's you trying your best to be really with it. That's what you wear when you're out on the pull.
   
DB:  {Slide of an old painting of little girls}
See that?
   
RN: I have observed the slide.
   
DB: That's your gang, that is. That's you with your hard mates.
{sings} Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough.
{slide of what looks like someone fishing something out of a murky sewer tunnel}

See that?
   
RN: Yes.
   
DB: That's the man who works inside your pants.
   
RN: {slide of a place that looks like it has been flattened by a tornado. The place is deserted}
See that?
   
DB: I have observed it.
   
RN: That's your most successful barbeque ever. That's, like, the biggest single gathering of all your friends in the whole world.
   
DB: {Slide of a morose old woman huddled in a chair in a far corner}
See that?
   
RN: I have observed the woman.
   
DB:

That's someone who you've just told your funniest joke.  Oh ha haha, tell it to me again Professor Lewis, do!
{Slide of a huge bomb or an old blimp in a warehouse}

See that?

   
RN: Yes.
   
DB: That's your prostate gland.
   
RN: I haven't got a prostate gland.
   
DB: Yes, that's why it's in that warehouse.
   
RN: {Slide of an old painting, small boy - Little Lord Fauntleroy type figure -
between two girls}

See *that*?
   
DB: You mean the boyish figure in-between the two girls ?
   
RN: Yes.
   
DB: I have observed the Fauntleroyish figure.
   
RN: You've lost of fight to him. He's staring you out right now!
You can't look him in the eye. Go on, stare at him.
{DB tries too but keeps
looking away}
You can't!
   
DB: {Slide of an old man kissing a small dog}
See that?
   
RN: Yes.
   
DB: That's you having your best ever snog.
   
RN: Your bird never told you she was with me.
   
DB: Well, I don't think anyone can be in any doubt. That tonight myself and
Professor Lewis have had the most rigorous of debates.
Professor
Lewis, thankyou very much.
   
RN: Thankyou.

 

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